One Smart Mother: The Blog

Being proactive pre and post pregnancy begins in the preconception stage by making conscious choices. Like everything in life, our lives as mothers evolve. What works for us one day may need to be reevaluated the next. Personal/professional identity and roles need to be adjusted as children grow, parents get older, mates change. High-achieving women often find the most difficulty in adjusting to the motherhood role. The laser focus of perfectionism either has to find a new target in the baby or the lens has to be softened.

Through education and with the support of groups and individual consultation, hopes and expectations can be addressed, thereby reducing stress and guilt. Despite the myriad of information available online, in print, there is tremendous power in the human connection of meeting with a group. Sharing in a respectful atmosphere helps to normalize the experience. Individual consultation can help a woman identify priorities, values and other important factors toward making proactive choices in her life.

At a workshop at Harvard Medical School, I have been discussing the topic of high-achieving women entering motherhood. We all agreed that such women often have a more difficult time adjusting to their new role. One young very upwardly mobile mother said, “Oh yes, the narcissist”.